Two years ago we were eagerly preparing for the arrival of our new little baby girl. Washing up clothes, buying new "pink" things, getting the crib set up, and making sure the bottles were ready right along with the infant car seat. I had never been so excited in my life. I prayed to God to please give me a little girl so that I would have 2 girls and 2 boys. It was my ultimate dream, my vision, and my prayer. The Lord answered my prayer, but gave us a little bit more than what we asked for. Thinking back to the evening of January 29, 2007 jogs many memories, most of which are so vivid in my mind it seems like it all unfolded just yesterday. At the time little did I know the huge impact that night and that one moment would have on my life and my family's life. My life went from really easy to extremely difficult very quickly.
It has been a rather emotional time for me. I remember last year when she was turning one I felt these same feelings. Feelings of fearing the unknown and the future and what the road ahead looks like. Maybe it is destined to happen every year around the celebration of her birthday. I am happy to celebrate her two years of life, but in the back of my mind only wish she was 6 months old. That way her age would match her developmental age. It is so very hard for me still to get a grip on knowing she is so developmentally delayed. It tears my heart apart. There are no other words to describe it. And knowing that the gap will always be there saddens me. I truly don't know if I'll ever be able to come to terms with it completely. So, when people ask me how Alayna is doing I can say "great." It's me that has this hang-up, but I'm continually working on it and I hope to eventually say someday that I'm great too.
So, happy "birth" day to Alayna. She continues to touch our lives every single day and remind us of what is important. We love you and can't wait to celebrate with the families on Sunday. I hope to put a nice post together with lots of pictures. Say a prayer that Alayna will like to dig into her cake this year!
11 comments:
Happy Birthday Alayna from your friends out in Utah! You're getting to be a such a big girl. We hope to see you this summer.
Alayna,
Happy 2nd Birthday from Grandma Diana and Grandpa Denny. Can't wait to celebrate your birthday on Sunday! You have made great strides in the past couple of months. We are so proud of you and love you very much!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!
Happy Birthday to our dear sweet granddaughter, Alayna. Precious child, Grandpa Richard and I love you and your special family very much. We pray for you, and them, and only wish we could take away the limitations of your little body.
Someday, the heaviness of all your hearts will be lifted and you will realize why God gave you this special challenge. Always know, you are all surrounded by love and support and your family would do anything for any one of you.
We're looking forward to the celebration on Sunday. . .
Grandma Billie
Happy Birthday Alayna. Enjoy your day.
Mom..give yourself permission to feel what you are feeling...I get emotional every year on Kylee's Birthday. I just think how hard we work to get her to each birthday and I pre-warn everyone that I am going to be emotional on that day. It is what it is.
You are both great parents and having such loving and supportive family and friends. You are truly blessed.
Karen
.HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALAYNA!!!
What a beautiful little angel. Angie I know exactly what your going through. It gets better in time but you know you have to remember. Alayna is happy and really doesn't know or care what we feel she's missed. God has made her perfect, we just don't understand sometimes but He does in His own perfect way. There's no doubt God has changed me and our family in a good way. We have always been a very close family and this has even drawn us closer. Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like if Gavin were normal. I would never have known how much love I can have for a angel sent from God. We have 11 grandchildren and they are all adorable, but as I type, tears falling on my face, I can't express enough how I feel about him. I look in those brown eyes and he makes me so happy! I really can't truly express that feeling.
Alayna is such a doll baby, and so are the rest of your children. The most important thing is I have learned is I will never take anything for granted. Everytime I seen a child or adult with disabilities I want to go up to them and say something to them or their parents.
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Your right, every Birthday is truly a Special Day
Kathy (Gramma to Gavin}
Happy Birthday, Alayna! I, too, remember the night you came into our lives and what a special moment that was! You've come such a long way in these past 2 years and can't wait to celebrate on Sunday! Hugs and kisses your way.....
Happy 2nd Birthday beautiful Alayna!! We are wishing you a year of great accomplishments and look forward to sharing them you!
Your 1p- friends, Denise and Emily in Virginia
HAPPY BIRTHDAY Alayna!!!!!
Happy Birthday Alayna!! We hope you had a wonderful day and will have many more to come!! You have come a very long way and have made great accomplishments!! Way to go! Angie, Dana, Lexi, Drake, and Douglas....you all too have done so many wonderful things for your sweet Alayna. Keep up the great work! You all keep your chins up and know you all are doing such a great job!
Love,
Meg, Bill, Alayna & Alexa
"THANK YOU" TO ALL OF YOU FOR THE ENCOURAGING WORDS AND KIND COMMENTS. It makes every day a bit easier knowing that we have support, prayers, and others right along side of us going through the same things. Alayna had a wonderful birthday party and we enjoyed spending it with our families.
Happy Belated Birthday Alayna!!!! You are such a sweet, beautiful little princess! We can't wait to see you again!!
Angie..I have done the same thing at both birthdays for Sammie. I remember almost every detail of his life so far (I'm sure with age that will change! ahha) I spent both of his birthdays celebrating but also living his first day over and over again..thinking about the could ofs! At the end of each day, just like you, I am happy to be Sammie's mommy..there is no one else that could be! Same for your precious Alayna!
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